Strengthening our marriage/relationship(S) TIPS to keep our marriage and relationship vibrant, exciting etc.

I had this email shared to me by my Sister in law Lindsay- Thanks Lindsay. Also thanks to my friend Carli (one of Lindsay's sister's) who got this and shared this from a Church meeting, and talk.

 

My friend, Amidey, (yeah it is an odd name-pronounced Am eh D---I hate it when I get hung up on trying to say someone's name and can't focus on the rest...so there is pronunciation for ya.) Anyway, Amidey, has 6 kids and has been married 18 years. She said they had the best 1st year of marriage ever but 3 kids into it things were getting tougher. They weren't fighting or anything, they just had an empty relationship, they were going through the motions. Her husband was working a ton and she was taking care of the kids all by herself all the time. It was inconvenient when he would be home because it would mess with her schedule. They weren't in danger of divorce, but they weren't HAPPY. 

One day her hubby came to her and said, "I want to make you happy, that is my #1 goal, tell me 3 things I can improve on and he wrote them down." She told him 3 things and then asked for 3 things from him. He kissed her and said you are perfect. Each week he would check with her and add another couple items to the list. Each week she would give him things for his list. He strove to make her life easier and within a couple of weeks, she was reciprocating his actions. All of the sudden they were working so hard to make the other person happy and THEY were So happy. It only took 1 person to start the focus and their marriage improved a million times. They are the happiest, mos tin love couple you have ever seen. I love em both! She gave 8 tips:

1. Communicate: Talk to each other! Which sounds better: your spouse makes you mad about something, but you don't tell them. You walk around angry for 3 days and then finally your spouse says, did I do something to make you mad? and you yell DUH *&^&^%^$^*^*&(*&. OR right after it happens say, hey that really upset me.....communicate. If you need help with the dishes or packing a lunch from work, just ask, don't fume when the other doesn't read your mind. 

2. Focus on the Positive: Chances are your spouse didn't just say that comment to hurt your feelings. Example:  

Husband: I can't eat your chili. 

Wife thinks: I spent all day making him this chili from scratch and now he can't eat it, the last time he said it had no flavor this time I am sure it is too spicy.....I can't ever do it right, I am never cooking again. I hate chili anyway.

Chances are that is not what he meant SO REPEAT back what he said: You can't eat my chili? Husband: No, I have an ulcer and I can't eat anything spicy. 

Wife: OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ok, I will cook chili again. 

3. Love is a Verb Do loving things. Wrap up 2 Oreo's and set them on the dashboard of the car....who doesn't love oreos and you didn't even have to bake! :) Be kind and thoughtful to each other. Find something that is so important to your spouse. example: If your husband LOVES to be met at the door with hugs and kisses from you and the kids. DO it, it will make his night and feel appreciated for his hard work each day! If your wife loves to have her back rubbed, DO IT, it will make her night and feel loved!

4.Forgiveness: Forgive. We all make mistakes, holler, fight, show our worst selves to our family. Be quick to forgive and they will be quick to forgive back!

5. Be your best self: Be the person you were when you were dating. When you went out to dinner on a date were you sitting there with your head back saying, MY LIFE IS RUNNING ME OVER!" No, you were cheerful, fun, playful....be that person. Don't be afraid to get dressed up. 

6. Focus on your spouses needs first: Think, what can i do to make my spouses day better. Make him a lunch? Do the dishes when I get home from work? Help kids with homework, offer to make dinner for her? Call him or leave a love note text/message? Make his fav. dinner or surprise him with a fav. dessert?

7. When you both give, it works!: One person can start this and before you know it, the other person will desire to treat you as well as you are treating them....it is just natural. You have to be open and be ready to hear honest comments like "this meal isn't working for me."

8. The divine triangle: Imagine a triangle. Heavenly Father is the top point and you and your spouse are the 2 bottom points. as you each work your way towards God by serving your spouse, going to church, reading, praying, etc. you get closer and closer to God but also to each other. Awesome right?

I LOVED this class. I didn't do it justice, but it was so good and it has stuck with me. give give give to your spouse and your marriage will be one of happiness! :)

Going to the Temple.....

So today was a very wonderful day. My sweetheart and love Bryan went to the temple for the very 1st time. I of course went with him it was a Family activity so it was mom, dad, bryan and I. I had not been to the temple for a very very long time. So it was like it was my first time as well. It was such a wonderful experience.

Here is what I wrote and posted on my Facebook page


"Just got home from the temple with my Love Bryan Walls and mom and dad went as well. We all got to go! and what a wonderful experience it was. SO THIS IS THE first time in a very long time for me doing baptisms for the dead. AND my sweetheart's first time as well. It was like I had never done any baptisms before. Because it had been a long time. I was kind of al over the water and a little "figity" if that is the word you want to use for it. I almost started crying because of frustration with myself and being mad at myself.

I am never ever going that long in between temple attendance AGAIN!!!

When we were doing our confirmations how wonderful it was and blessed and happy I was/am to be able to have 2 very capable and worthy sets of hands on my hand (my dad's and my sweetheart's). I love and admire how they exercise their priesthood. Thanks my Sweetheart Bryan Walls !!! I love you so much. "


We are definitely going to make it a goal to continue to go more Often....

We went to the Salt lake Temple! I love that temple- as I love all the temples.

Photo credit and courtesy of the LDS Church and lds.org

Christlike Attributes—the Wind beneath Our Wings

Christlike Attributes—the Wind beneath Our Wings

 

"Developing Christlike attributes in our lives is not an easy task, especially when we move away from generalities and abstractions and begin to deal with real life. The test comes in practicing what we proclaim. The reality check comes when Christlike attributes need to become visible in our lives—as husband or wife, as father or mother, as son or daughter, in our friendships, in our employment, in our business, and in our recreation."

—Dieter F. Uchtdorf, "Christlike Attributes—the Wind beneath Our Wings"
Topics: Christlike Attributes

Until We Meet Again

Until We Meet Again

 

"I love you; I pray for you. I would ask once again that you would remember me and all the General Authorities in your prayers. We are one with you in moving forward this marvelous work. I testify to you that we are all in this together and that every man, woman, and child has a part to play. May God give us the strength and the ability and the determination to play our part well."

—Thomas S. Monson, "Until We Meet Again"
Topics: General Conference, Prophetic Messages

General Conference—No Ordinary Blessing

General Conference—No Ordinary Blessing

 

"The words spoken at general conference should be a compass that points the way for us during the coming months. If we listen to and follow the promptings of the Spirit, they will serve as a Liahona, guiding us through the unknown, challenging valleys and mountains that are ahead."

—Dieter F. Uchtdorf, "General Conference—No Ordinary Blessing"
Topics: General Conference

Wide Awake to Our Duties

Wide Awake to Our Duties

 

"This is a work of salvation, and the strengthening and enabling power of the Atonement makes it possible. Awaken to who we are. Awaken to our duty."

—Carole M. Stephens, "Wide Awake to Our Duties"
Topics: Work of Salvation, Atonement

Catching up.....

It has been awhile since we have blogged. Or should I say since I have blogged and in that time there has been some things that have happened and updates we/I want to update you on. I love blogging and I know how at times life get's to busy and we forget.


Here are our updates: 



*Bryan received the Melchezidek Preisthood & was ordained a Elder.


Bryan was given the Melchezidek Preisthood and ordained a Elder - my awesome dad was so honored to be able to give Bryan the Melchezidek Preisthood. - It was such a special day. Bryan was ordained in the Bishop's office immediately following sacrament meeting.  The bishop's office was "Full". There was so much love, and support for Bryan in that room.


Next step is for Bryan and I to start our temple classes and then by spring (hopefully) we will be going to the temple and kneeling across from each other.



*TEMPLE CLASSES


Bryan and I will be starting our temple classes Sunday we are so happy and excited. Excited to be able to this coming up spring go through the 1st time and be endowed and soon down the road going to the temple again TO KNEEL ACROSS THE ALTAR FROM Each other to be sealed for time and all eternity.

I can't wait for my best friend to be and become my eternal love, companion.

An Ensign to the Nations

An Ensign to the Nations

 

"We testify to every nation, kindred, tongue, and people that God not only lives but also that He speaks, that for our time and in our day the counsel you have heard is, under the direction of the Holy Spirit, 'the will of the Lord, … the word of the Lord, … the voice of the Lord, and the power of God unto salvation' (Doctrine and Covenants 68:4)."

—Jeffrey R. Holland, "An Ensign to the Nations"
Topics: General Conference